Here’s the jist of it my friends. I’m tired. And this has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I rarely go to bed before 1:00 AM.
No. It’s more to do with other things. Some important. But mostly not. Tis the lot of a fretter such as me. Fretting equals energy consumption. Fretters fret about it all, big or small. I should have that stitched on my pillow yes?
Well you see here’s one of the things. My Bubba turned two this weekend. And besides the silly amount of time I spent making a dinosaur cake (which looked okay but tasted gross, so says the Husband because apparently neon green food coloring can make icing taste toxic, whatever), I am now spending many an anxious moment quietly pondering how I dislike change very much. But then again I like it very much. But ultimately I dislike it very much. You can see how this can be very tiring.
So along with Bubba's birthday came a trip to a farm to see animals. I sort of dislike all animals. Well that statement is probably not true. Actually it’s more that I feel uncomfortable around most animals because they have brains that I cannot read, unlike humans which have very readable brains. For example, that one time when I was twelve and a bird pooped on my head? I had no idea that was coming. I would have preferred that I could have looked that bird in the eye(s) and known a second before hand that poop was on the horizon, like I can usually do with my human offspring. You know?
So obviously a day at a farm was taxing. But surprisingly not because of the animals. I sort of enjoyed the docile ones. Like the heifers.
No, it was more the kids that zapped me of strength. Crying, whining, crying, whining, duck food in the face, pleas for water, tractor rides, runny noses, pleas for candy, whining, followed by the heinous cry-whining.
And then to top it off, when the day was done the kids said they had a great time. So I’m left to wonder what family outings would be like if they weren’t supposedly enjoying themselves. Yikes indeed.
So in summary, I have two boys and one husband. One is thirty. One is four and one is two. And I am thirty. Last week we went four days without bananas, and two days without ice cream. I have twenty-eight teeth, two of which required another trip to the dentist (don’t ask). There are twenty-four hours in the day and I wasted two watching the Bachelor Pad, I ordered one dress from the internet and am returning one dress. I have one nose, two nostrils, only one of which is currently working. One throat that is scratchy and two moles that are bumpy. And one nap to take. After I eat one piece of that wretched dinosaur cake.
See you later.