3.02.2011

Let's talk about how I'm a monkey mom

At the risk of sounding too serious for a Thursday, this motherhood thing is getting hard you guys! Just when I think I've got my fine little groove thang going on, and I am rockin' it as a mom, or as Oprah would call it, a Warrior Mom! Hey-O!, things just up and change.

Enter:
The wiping of multiple butts, of multiple noses
Broken things, including, but not limited to, my back
Nightmares
Screaming
"Shut up!"s
Disharmony
The whining! Oh the whining!
Increasing noise levels
Brawling
A new bulging vein in my forehead. I'm not kidding.

Problem is I just thought I had more time to become a better person so I would be fully equipped to handle all this poop! Literally and metaphorically.  Give me the innocence and simplicity of baby poop any day over the complexities and foulness of toddler poop. Again literally and metaphorically.

What I'm trying to say is I thought I'd have more time to develop the patience of a mongoose, the tenacity of a walrus, and the creativity of a liger before these kids of mine sniffed out a dumbfounded mom in their midst.

But now, instead of being prepared and perfect like I originally planned, I've got to wrangle the task of raising these two boys while being more like a monkey mother who just makes it up as she goes, and hits herself in the head with a stick along the way while other monkeys throw bananas at her. The beginnings of insanity are already apparent.

Tip me over and pour.me.out.

2 comments:

Rainee said...

OH I can't imagine!

Aubry Macbean said...

The Phrase "monkey see monkey do" has never been more apparent at my house. If only it would transfer over into potty training. That wouldn't be so bad.

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