How many times was I awakened last night? Let me count the ways.
1:00 AM Gun shot or some pre-pre-fireworks. Rowdy teenage neighbor most likely the culprit. Officially falling asleep is pushed back another fifteen minutes.
2:00 AM One of our smoke detectors goes off, sending waves of hysteria through my barely coherent body. The panic-inducing squeals only last five to ten seconds but that’s enough to snap me out of lala land, and leave me in a sleepless stupor.
2:15 AM Fully creeped out that our fire alarm went off briefly, I decide I should go investigate since the Husband is obviously not going to. No fire or smoke to be found. But one of the smoke detectors is blinking a red light. I assume this means a low battery. I reassure myself that that can wait until morning.
3:30 AM Roll over onto my left side only to realize that my bosom is throbbing in pain? Clogged duct again? Didn’t I just do this?
4:00 AM Pain has now traveled to my back and neck. Cannot move my neck more than two inches without wanting to punch the Husband in the back, while he’s still sleeping soundly.
5:30 AM Bubba starts crying tears of hunger. I decide to feed him so he’ll go back to sleep. The Husband brings him to me and I realize he (the baby) has snot all over his face so he’s sick and hungry . . . and he’s wide awake.
6:00 AM Still cannot rock Bubba back to sleep so I just lay him in his crib because I’m too exhausted for such tomfoolery and my shoulder is seething. The babe must have entertained himself or fallen asleep because I don’t remember the next hour.
7:00 AM Bubba starts crying again. But my head, neck, shoulder, and boob are pounding in pain. Go find the Husband who has fallen asleep on the couch to put him on Daddy duty.
7:45 AM Bubba is fussing yet again so I feed him . . . again. He seems drowsy so I attempt to put him back to sleep even though holding him sends searing waves of evil through my shoulder.
8:00 AM Decide to put Bubba in bed with me as he will not go to sleep. As usual, this only ends in Bubba crawling all over me, pounding on my tender boob, and head butting me in the face. The Husband has left for work so sleep will not likely come. Plus Bosco will wake up any minute now. And he does.
Today has been a rough day. Bright side? At least I’m not a skunk. Skunks have it hard.
Another bright side? A small thunderstorm rolled in, and I love me-self an electric aura in the air.